I was sent this by someone who should know better

Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time and decided that, in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to share office space and personnel.

Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist and Dr. Jones was the proctologist; they put up a sign reading: “Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors.”
The town council was livid and insisted they change it.

So, the docs changed it to read: “Schizoids and Hemorrhoids.”
This was also not acceptable, so they again changed the sign.

“Catatonics and High Colonics” - No go.

Next, they tried “Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives” - thumbs down again.

Then came “Minds and Behinds” - still no good!

Another attempt resulted in “Lost Souls and Butt Holes” - unacceptable again!

So they tried “Analysis and Anal Cysts” - not a chance.

“Nuts and Butts” - no way.

“Freaks and Cheeks” - still no good.

“Loons and Moons” - forget it.

Almost at their wit's end, the docs finally came-up with:
“Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones - Specializing in Odds and Ends”.

Everyone loved it.

HAPPY NEW YEAR

The year of the Water Dragon ... which is me! What is uncanny is how accurate this depiction is of me first thing in the morning as I emerge from the bath!

New Year - New Laptop

Cast into the outer darkness...

... where there will be weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth.

My laptop has died.

Or to be more precise, the motherboard has died.


I turned it on - several lines of DOS script flashed across the top of the screen, and then it turned itself off.

I turned it on, and couldn't get past the initial Toshiba flash screen. The keyboard was dead, and so was the power button. The only way I could turn it off was to flip it over and remove the battery.

A trip to a shop has confirmed the death of the motherboard, so as it will be cheaper to buy a replacement laptop rather than get a new motherboard and have it fitted (with no guarantee on its life), the laptop is now in pieces in my kitchen with various parts earmarked for sale on E-bay.

The only consolation - both hard drives are still working and by using an external caddy I can access them, so I have not lost any files or pictures.

Could have been worse.