Friday, 21 March 2014

Miserable Old Git syndrome

Oh for ***** sake ......

From the Diocesan website:

As part of our support of A Season of Invitation, the diocese will be hosting three 2-hour events on Wednesday 25th June in which Michael Harvey (A Season of Invitation, Executive Team) will provide training for clergy, readers, wardens and church members on how to successfully hold A Season of Invitation.

I thought I'd been doing this all through my ministry every Christmas, Easter and Harvest. How did the church survive almost 2,ooo years without this incessant "training"?

From Paul, Apostle of our Lord Jesus Christ, to the faithful at .......... I shall be holding a training session for our elders and leaders in the gymnasium at Corinth next Thursday. Please be sure to attend so that the Holy Spirit will know what he/she is supposed to be doing, and how we can enable him/her to make converts to the faith.

I despair ... and I won't be going.

Wednesday, 22 January 2014

The best-dressed man in Normandy

Having just finished 2 volumes of stories by Isaac Asimov, I thought I should change my reading genre, and so I plucked from my bookcase "Highways & Byways of Normandy" by the Rev. Percy Dearmer (he of church ceremonial fame), published in 1900. Written for the gentleman taking a cycling tour of the region, he give, in his Introduction, some sartorial advice which it would be entertaining to revive.

"If one takes a portmanteau, it is easy to carry a sufficient change of clothes, including some linen shirts and collars, and also that most precious boon, a folding india-rubber bath."

It took me a few moments to realise that he was talking about a small item which would allow you to locate a puncture in your bicycle tyre rather than a full-size receptacle for personal hygiene! He continues:

"It is most important to wear nothing but woollen clothes for cycling, and if one does this I do not think it is worth while carrying a mackintosh. There is no place in Normandy where one cannot wear a knickerbocker suit with an easy conscience."

Now that is something I need to remember on my next foray across the Channel!

Monday, 9 December 2013


Now is the winter of my ministry Made glorious Advent by this week’s Retreat; And all the work that lour'd upon my desk In piles of papers lie to the side buried. Now is my brow less furrowed with sermon text; My PCC Agendas hung up for monuments; My diary engagements changed to merry meetings, And a wondrous march to delightful southern coast. Grim-visaged congregations hath smooth'd their wrinkled front; And now, instead of calling on the ‘phone To fright my soul with fearful news and plight, The instrument lies soundless and ringeth not. And though I to foreign Brugge have often gone, Not now traverseth I the watery main, For gentle Sisters there doth not a Guest House run, But concentrate their thought on matters spiritual. And so without a tonne of chocolate must I live, And quench my thirst with local brew Instead of wondrous ale. And yet, I shall partake of pleasant company Upon the shores of Merrie England, And sup and dine and give the gifts That doth this coming Season make.

Tuesday, 15 October 2013

Getting there

The painter finished his work last Thursday, and so since then it has been a case of restocking the rooms with my possessions that have been stored in the two large sea-going containers on my front lawn. By Sunday night they were empty, though the interior of the sitting room, study and two upstairs bedrooms rooms looked like the Vikings had just raided, though without the accompanying rape! Tonight, Tuesday, the downstairs rooms are back in operation and work continues with the bedrooms. One of 95% there, and the other is about 50%. By the end of this week we should be ship-shape again.

It's been somewhat disturbing having my home and workplace in upheaval, more so than I anticipated, and there have been unexpected stress-related consequences. And we're not finished yet ... there's the containers to be collected (next Monday) and then both drives remodelled and re-laid, and a new garage door.

Guests arrive mid-November. We should be ready to receive them by then.


Friday, 13 September 2013

I feel honoured ....

... four builders have turned up today. There's banging and heaving in all directions, and I'm waiting for something major to fall out!